Bah Humbug

Not a huge fan of the holidays. I’m not into fake cheer. I used to either not talk to you or cap on you directly to your face.

But I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. By trying, I mean like three weeks ago.

Breathe.
Be nice.
Smile.
Compliment.
Encourage.
Say nice things.
Avoid confrontation.

It’s mad boring….

Somehow the world took parables passed down by humans and made them into facts that have come to define our understanding and psychology towards the universe. And gave them birthdays.

But I’m breathing. It’s a happy time. Family you never see all together again. Food you never eat all year all over again.

It’s still hard, that leaf is heavy to turn.

I come from the kitchen. Deadlines, dirty jokes, damaged innocence. Words are not slurred or wasted. No fake smiles or passive aggressive compliments. Give it to me now and give it to me perfect. Get the fuck out if not.

I’ll be in Vegas during the new year with bags under my eyes talking shit at the poker table, drinking heavily.

This week I’ll be working like normal telling dirty jokes and meeting deadlines, trying to make the food delicious.

And if breathing doesn’t work during this holiday season, then you can find me faded at Venice Beach skating far far away.

I’ll be eating these. So whether you are a holiday fan or not, these brownies are sure to be a hit.

Venice Beach Brownies

2 lbs kush butter (melt butter slowly in a pan with a lot — maybe an ounce — of finely ground OG Kush and cook slowly for 45 minutes over a low low flame as not to brown. Then strain and push the solids to extract THC. Cool butter in a jar till solid again)
4 lbs of semi sweet chocolate chips
40 oz eggs
3 c flour, sifted
3 c sugar, sifted
3 c brown sugar
2 T vanilla extract
1 orange, zested

Preheat your oven to 350F.

Melt the kush butter and chocolate together slowly in a pot or double boiler.

Separately, mix the eggs, sugars, vanilla, and zest together.

Mix the chocolate butter with the flour.

Add the egg mixture to the chocolate.

Pour into a greased sheet pan. You can make a kush oil to grease your sheet pan too, the same way as the butter.

Bake at 350F for 25 minutes.

Fade into the holidays.

2 thoughts on “Bah Humbug

  1. Yeah, this looks like a huge recipe.

    Should I start with 2 lbs of butter or should I have 2 lbs of kush butter after I’ve strained it.

    Also, what size sheet pan?

    I can’t wait to try this…

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